Ever caught yourself doing insane things like setting a 12 minute alarm? or Bringing six pens for an exam because you have trust issues.
If you answered a ‘YES’, welcome to the squad bud.
*bro fist* *chest thump* (Ok now I am over doing it).
Welcome to the real world, where life is not all about fairies and unicorns. As a student, happiness is basically hearing these two words ‘cancelled’ and ‘free’.
Here are the struggles every college student faces at least once in their college life.
The lies we keep telling ourselves, I’ll start my work earlier, i’ll go to all my classes, I’ll sleep on time and the biggest one of all, I’ll spend less money. Ha ha Ha.
That moment when the alarm rings, you sit up and wonder, ‘Do I really need an education?’
Attendance, ladies and gentlemen is a very serious business! It is a life and death situation. Professors know this very well and sometimes, use it for their evil benefit. If you don’t keep quiet ‘Attendance will be cut”, if you don’t “stop talking, the entire classes attendance goes”. Professors throw around the word, attendance so loosely it hurts.
What is sleep? Eh?
*Touches forehead rather dramatically*
EH. Beyond me. Never heard of it.
Waking up everyday is a surprise, especially for a college student.
Let me give you an example, ‘Waking up to see your wallet.’ You’re like “I think I can afford a peanut today? We students are super creative, we have even come up with a new definition of poor,”Too much month left at the end of your money”.
Also, once the what I like to call it “Physical money”, we can see and touch is over, Students go lengths to justify it to themselves that using cards isn’t actually spending money.
- People asking how was class?
Like seriously man? Like really? I would rather be wasted on a boat eating doughnuts but here I am trying to do something great with my future.
5. PROCRASTINATION IS YOUR SIDE KICK
It’s insane how much, a student can procrastinate, we even procrastinate to sleep.
The level a student will go to justify and pacify themselves is insane. Procrastination becomes your best friend and together we conquer the world. Don’t feel like work? or hate being called lazy? Ya I get it, Lazy, because lazy is such an ugly word. I much rather call it ‘Selective Participation’. ‘There now I can sleep at night.’
6. STUDYING FOR EXAMS
How I study for exams is like, 70% of the time I’m staring into space, 20% is tears and 4% skimming through notes while nothing goes in. Yup that’s basically it. Crying becomes your second hobby.
7. STRESS VISITS YOU ALMOST EVERYDAY
The best part of being stress, is you don’t even know you’re stressed. Then you get stressed, because you’re not stressed. Don’t avoid stress, eat a cupcake darling.
8. MOTIVATION AND THEN ITS GONE
Ever felt so motivated after an inspirational class and you feel like you can literally conquer the world, but then the minute you get back to your room, you’re like done for the day. I feel you bruh. We all have those moments in life.
9. CONTEMPLATING LIFE
Thinking about your life leaves you like ? ‘Whaaaaaaaaaaaa AM I DOINGGGGG?’
10.Having free time and convincing yourself you’ll be productive.
The best feeling when the lecture gets cancelled and you’re still in bed, thinking, ‘Oh well, I am going to be productive today,’ and 5 hours down the line you’re still stuck on your phone, scrolling through instagram and snapchat, ’cause you feel like a useless piece of shit.
THUS, MY ADVICE IS THIS DO WELL IN COLLEGE AND GET A GOOD JOB BECAUSE THE MORE MONEY YOU MAKE, THE MORE PUPPIES YOU CAN ADOPT, AND PUPPIES ARE THE ROOT OF HAPPINESS.